Everyone has their tells and sometimes even if you think you’re ready to get back on that gravy train, you’re just not ready. You might think that you are, but you’re giving out vibrations that are telling anyone who is paying attention that you’re far from being ready for getting back into the dating game. These people are toxic to date because they’ll keep dragging you down with them. One of the most important parts of dating is being secure and confident in yourself. You need to be stable and know what you’re doing because you’re involving another person who doesn’t deserve to be dragged into your life if it’s in complete shambles.
Rather, if it’s in complete shambles and you are falling to pieces because of it.
There are many people who can have bad situations in their life and still act admirably. They can find comfort and joy in other people without burdening them or trying to find someone who will save them magically from their desperate and seemingly hopeless situation. So we surveyed our members and asked them what they thought were the signs that would tell them that someone is not ready to date them.
This just shows a lack of interest. We get that sometimes these things are unavoidable, but when you’re doing it on a regular basis you’re going to start giving signals to your affair partner telling them that you’re at best uninterested and at worst thoughtless about their feelings. Keep in mind that the people you are having affairs with are also rescheduling their busy lives for you and if you don’t respect that, you’re going to get ditched permanently.
There are people who just can’t stop putting themselves down. Whether it’s consciously or subconsciously you always want to put your best foot forward on a date and to not realize how you’re putting yourself down shows a lack of self-awareness. If you say “Oh, I haven’t had time to get my hair coloured lately” when someone compliments your hair or choose the cheaper option because you’re having “money issues”, you’re putting yourself down. If you talk about how you’re having trouble keeping up at work or how sometimes you feel hopeless or if you just complain all the time, you’re going to have trouble getting a second date. No one likes a negative Nancy.
Some people just couldn’t pick up on signals if they were slapped across the face with them and why should you be that person? One thing about sex on the first date is that if it hasn’t already been agreed upon between you and your affair partner that sex is on the menu, don’t talk about it. If they’re thinking about it, they’re thinking about it. Otherwise it just makes you seem crass in front of your affair partner, especially because some people aren’t as comfortable talking about sex so you need to be respectful of that.
There isn’t a person who likes to hear about the other people who have been on your life while on a date. Maybe later when the date is winding down, but on a first date do not mention your exes or spouse beyond a line or two. At best you would sound hung up and at worst, fixated. How you treat your exes or talk about your exes is a really telling way for people to measure you because if you’re fixated and bitter, they know that you’re going to be bitter while out with your current affair partner as well. Again, no one likes a negative Nancy and you will chase people off quickly with your rants about how your ex is crazy. Give an offhand comment if anything. Nobody tends to mind small comments about the ex as long as you don’t make too many of them.
Using your phone before the date is all well and good, but while you’re on the date is just horrible. You want someone who will pay attention to you and not their phone. If you wanted to be ignored in the company of others you could just sit around with your spouse all night. So if you’re a phone addict, find a patch or an app for that because no one will want to date you or have an affair with you if your phone is going off every five minutes and you just have to check.