Ashley Moments Official Ashley Madison Blog | Is Hookup Culture A Bad Thing?
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Is Hookup Culture A Bad Thing?

We have talked before about the much-maligned hookup culture that we’re all hearing so much about and the reasons behind hookup culture vary depending on who you’re talking to. For some people, it’s the lack of time, while for others it just seems like a natural progression in dating. For some people (generally from older generations), the hookup culture that permeates today’s society is a direct reflection of how the moral fibre of any country is fraying. If you search “hookup culture”, you’ll see many explanations for why it exists and how, but you’ll also notice that people have already made their decisions about whether it’s good or bad.

For those who think that hookup culture is a bad thing, they’ll talk about how people feel ashamed or how they can’t connect like they used to. We don’t necessarily think that’s the case. Shame is a societal construction; we shame the people who don’t fit in with the preconceived idea of normal within a society. The idea that we can’t connect the way that we used to is too simplistic as well. After all, we are more connected than ever, and while our methods of communication have changed, we are generally able to still make and maintain  close connections.

So what’s the problem with hookup culture then?

Probably the sex part.

Basically, people are having sex at a rate that previous generations could only dream of. It’s different, so it’s wrong and not something that people should aspire to. This is what we’re told, but that falls back on the old ideas of monogamy that we’re taught to aspire to. We guess that in the end it really depends on what you find important. The moral pillars that people cling too aren’t surviving as well as they might like in a constantly changing world. Large institutions like marriage and monogamy appear to do better when the world is more static. Note that we said “appear” since adultery and non-monogamy is rife throughout all of human history.

As to what side of the debate is right when it comes to hookup culture, we’d argue that neither of them are. After all, like many things—adultery, marriage, monogamy, polyamory, casual sex—it’s hard to break down a complex adult relationships into simplistic binary sides. There are people for whom hookup culture is good people for whom hookup culture is bad. It’s all a matter of perspective and the type of person who you are.

Maybe you’re a shy, introvert and the hookup culture that permeates modern society isn’t working in your favor. It’s okay, you’re not alone. There are plenty of different avenues to connect with others, and the way that people focus in on hookup culture as if that’s the way that an entire generation treats sex is misleading at best.

Is hookup culture wrong then?

Well, like most of the harder questions in life, that’s really up for you to decide for yourself.

If you think that participating in hookups will make you happy then by all means, go for it. If you think that a hookup lifestyle would make you unhappy, then don’t do it.

It’s as simple as that.

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